you win again, gameday.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
