Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
