Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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