barbara walters just said penis...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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