first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
