I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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