I need help removing her.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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