The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
