Already got asked if we're dating
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Randomize
