how hairy? two words: wookie tits
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I will be naked everywhere
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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