peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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