I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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