you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
