i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
