Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
