Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
