brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
