Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
