birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize