SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
