The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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