I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize