eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
what day is it and did you see me today?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize