Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
