Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
