Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
