I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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