He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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