ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
