was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
