i permit you to call me
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
