I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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