He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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