my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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