Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
i came on her dog
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
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