Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
