he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
