so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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