He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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