Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I made him laugh his dick is mine
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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