She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
