my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
