how can u be prego again
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize