I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
my liver is dry heaving
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize
