just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize