so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
