ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
