so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
what the fuck happened to the tacos
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
