I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
