I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
