Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Are my feet made of real feet?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Randomize
